I have recently begun reading the novel, Say What You Will, by Cammie McGovern. This is a very interesting novel, because first of all, it will not officially be sold until June 3rd. I was just lucky enough to find the Advanced Reader's Copy at a local bookstore in Michigan. ARC novels are basically just uncorrected proofs printed prior to the book's actual publication date.Anyways, this novel is very interesting, because it not only has a peculiar plot, but involves two misfits, who I am yet to determine whether or not they just become good friends, or a unique and distinguishing couple. These misfits aren't the usual misfits you would imagine: complicated life at home. Can't relate with others. Just don't fit in. Sure, Matthew and Amy experience all of these struggles, but they aren't the worst of their troubles. Amy: She's crippled and has to use a walker. She has to talk through a computer device. Accompanied by an aid, she walks the walls of her high school. Matthew: He constantly worries over nothing. He has a voice in his head. The voice tells him constantly to go through weird routines such as washing his hands to his elbows 12 times a day. The only person that knows of this voice in his head is Amy. Though fascinating and thought-provoking, the novel's distinct plot isn't the only aspect intrigues me. Only about 80 pages in the book, I am extremely captivated by how McGovern portrays Matthew's intricate mind.
Perplexing and scattered, Matthew's mind seems to be constantly worried over what should be nothing, that is, to ordinary people of course. For instance, Matthew used to love reading. However, the voice has ruined that for him. Matthew said, "I get worried about reading things the wrong way. Sometimes I have to read the same page over and over. I keep thinking I've made a mistake."(pg.49) I find this action of reading a page over and over from fear of mistake, rather unusually compulsive. However, it's not his fault. The voice in Matthew's head makes him perform compulsive actions like this. "He could hear the voice now. You missed a word. Go back. If you don't go back nothing will make sense."(pg.49) As you can see from this quote, the voice in Matthews mind is very controlling over Matthew's actions.Throughout the 80 pages I have read so far, I have noticed that Matthew constantly checks if the faucet at his house is off and constantly counts things and goes through other weird routines throughout his day, which I also find quite compulsive. As I read on, I have also noticed that the voice gets slightly more aggressive and disparaging. Immediately after finding out that he was born a day before Amy in the same hospital, the voice convinces Matthew that he is responsible for Amy becoming crippled at birth. The voice tells Matthew," You were there, the voice said. You were there when it happened. He waited for the inevitable: It was probably your fault." (pg. 50) Reading this quote completely convinced me that Matthew had a serious mental disorder. This quote showed me how Matthew's mind quickly draws to irrational and illogical conclusions. I know what you're thinking: A. This guy is cray B. This voice thing is kinda creepy. After learning about this terrifying voice in Matthew's head, I suspect that he is either schizophrenic or has OCD. The problem: Matthew is in denial that he has a mental problem and will not try to find help for it.
Below are links I found that are about OCD and Schizophrenia:
OCD Symptoms
Schizophrenia Symptoms




















